


Prove It

by xalypso



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-22
Updated: 2016-04-22
Packaged: 2018-06-03 17:13:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,882
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6619285
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xalypso/pseuds/xalypso
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Phil persuades Dan to sign up for a gym membership with the couples’ discount, even though they aren’t really gay.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Prove It

“Hey, Dan,” Phil said, nudging him with an elbow. “This gym isn’t too pricey.”  
Dan glanced away from his own screen and leaned over to see what Phil had found. “£80 per month, Phil? That’s what you consider ‘not too expensive’?”  
Phil shrugged and crinkled his forehead, a strand of black hair falling across his eyes.  
“London just costs so much. I can’t believe we thought it was a good idea to move here, or go on this fitness kick.” He gave Dan a pointed glare, and Dan raised his eyebrows and held his hands up above his shoulders.  
“I mean, we could just sit around here, eating Chinese takeaway and Doritos while we watch anime every day until we start looking like morbidly obese naked mole rats, if that’s what you want.”  
Phil sighed. “No, getting in shape a good idea, you’re right. It just costs so much to get a gym membership around here.”  
Dan pulled the laptop back onto his lap and scrolled further down the search results, while Phil idly scratched off a peeling sticker from the back of his MacBook.  
They’d both vowed that in London, they’d start eating better and getting in shape properly. Eating healthily had been surprisingly easy, and Phil had researched on health blogs for ages until their recipe binder was practically overflowing, the cover straining as if it were about to burst. The meal planner held on their fridge by a magnet was filled with spicy butternut squash pasta, lentil and goat cheese casserole, sesame encrusted salmon, and pan-seared fish tacos.  
Phil had even gone so far as to throw out all of their ribena, and they’d moved to just Shreddies and Ready Brek for their cereal, but they were still missing any sort of exercise component to their new routine. They’d started running together, but it wasn’t enough, so they had decided to join a gym.  
“Phil, what about this one?” said Dan, “It’s pretty close by, and their fee is £60 per month, which I think is manageable. Looks pretty big too, and they have some nice stuff.”  
“Let me see?”  
Dan passed the laptop over, and sighed, folding his hands over his stomach. “What do you think?”  
Phil scrolled down the site, clicking through their offerings. “They have flatscreens for their treadmills, and aerobics classes, and a swimming pool. Dan, look! We could start kickboxing.”  
“So, what do you think?”  
Phil nodded. “Seems pretty good to me. Is the fee £60 for each of us, or both of us?”  
“Uhhh,” Dan said, peering at the screen as he zoomed in on the small print. “Shoot. It’s per person.”  
“That sucks. Still too expensive.”  
Dan sighed and went back to his search, as Phil typed the same address into his computer.  
“Oh, wait, Dan, I might have something here.”  
Dan sat up slightly on the sofa, leaning towards Phil. “What is it?”  
“Looks like they have a £50 discount for couples, so that’s only £70 for both of us, for a whole month.”  
“Phil, you know we aren’t a couple, right, just friends? And neither of us are dating anyone at the moment.”  
Sadly, he thought, deflating a little inside.  
Phil shrugged. “It’s not like we’re going to be asked to prove it. We could totally pretend to be a couple— it’s not like they can just turn us away because we’re supposedly gay.”  
Dan rolled his eyes. “Are you serious?”  
Secretly, he wished Phil were serious, but it wasn’t like he could let Phil know that. Besides, it wasn’t really fair to him.  
“Unless you have a better suggestion. I mean, I don’t really want to pay £120 for just a month of membership when we could only pay £70 otherwise.”  
“I suppose,” Dan replied, still mildly hesitant. “What time is it open until?”  
“Um, 11pm, I think. We could go and sign up now, maybe even do some exercise— it’s not even seven.”  
“Good with me. Do you have gym stuff?”  
“Yeah, it’s in my room. Can you put the address in your phone and get directions? I’ll grab your running bag and pack some stuff while I’m there. I need some real clothes, while I’m at it.” Phil gestured down at his Star Wars pyjama bottoms and blue hoodie.  
Dan laughed and heaved himself off the sofa as Phil left, rounding the corner and disappearing to his room.  
He grabbed a pad of paper and set his laptop on the kitchen counter, before pulling the cap off his pen.  
“57 Wilshaw Road,” he muttered, and tore off the sheet. He pulled his phone from his pocket and tapped in the address to Google maps, getting the walking directions they needed.  
As it was loading, he tugged on a pair of black shoes and zipped them up.  
“Phil?” he called, “You coming?”  
“One sec!” Phil replied, from room as something hit the floor. Dan winced at the crash.  
“Phil, what was that?”  
“Just the books in my wardrobe,” he replied, “Nothing much!”  
“Do you want me to come back there, help you out?”  
“Dan, no!” he yelped, his voice almost breaking. “I’m in my boxers!”  
Dan rolled his eyes, despite Phil being unable to see him. Yeah, and that would just make it even better. Get rid of the boxers, and then…  
Phil snapped him out of his trance as he came back into the kitchen, shoes on and hands in his pockets. “Ready?”  
“Uh, yeah.” Dan replied, and pulled the door open, shouldering his bag. “It’s about a ten minute walk from here. Wilshaw Road.”  
They stood together quietly in the lift as they rode down to the door, with Phil shifting from foot to foot.  
Dan stared at the ceiling, trying to ignore the elderly woman with her strongly feline odour until she left, and hobbled away at full speed.  
“So,” Phil said, as they started walking. “What should we do first?”  
“I don’t know about you, but I think those treadmills sound pretty sweet.” Dan replied, grinning. “Must be the plasma screen tellies.”  
“Hmm,” Phil twisted his mouth, and shrugged. “Are you sure about that? We could really get into the spirit of it and do some weight lifting!”  
Dan practically cackled at that. “You’re going to try weight lifting?”  
“Yeah!” Phil said, indignant, lifting up his arm and bending it at the elbow. “Look at these biceps!”  
Raising an eyebrow, Dan cast his doubt on Phil’s claim.  
“Oh, come on,” Phil protested, “Maybe the exercise bikes?”  
“Sounds more like it. Anyway, we’re here.”  
From the outside, the gym looked remarkably polished and professional. Its name was written in silver lettering across the front of floor-to-ceiling windows, lit from the inside by fluorescent lights.  
“Dan?” Phil asked, as he pushed the door open. “You coming?”  
“Yeah, thanks.”  
Inside the gym, a reception desk curved around the wall in front of the equipment, and a sour-faced older man greeted them.  
“Hello, welcome to Central Gym. Can I help you this evening?” he droned, boredom seeping through his tone.  
Phil glanced at Dan, stifling a tiny giggle.  
“Yes, please,” he said, resting his hands on the counter. “We’d like to sign up for a monthly gym membership.”  
The man— Wayne, according to his badge— sighed, as though the weight of the world fell on his shoulders. “That’ll be £120 per month. Are you paying individually, or together? Because—”  
Phil grabbed Dan’s hand and tugged him forwards, sending a sting of electricity through his body.  
“Actually,” he said, clearing his throat. “I think it’s only £70, since we’re a couple.”  
Wayne raised an eyebrow and coughed. “You’re gays?”  
“Yes,” said Phil, his voice more impatient, although with just a touch of hesitation. “We gay. We’re a couple.”  
“You know, you’re going to have to prove—” started Wayne, his voice gravelly.  
“Prove what, exactly?” Phil said, icily. “You know, it’d be discriminatory for you to ask us to prove that we’re gay.”  
“Fine.” Wayne yanked a paper from a file under the desk, and slapped it on the counter with a pen. “Sign the dotted line, please. Both of you.”  
Dan’s eyes met Phil, and he winked, flourishing the pen as he signed.  
Wayne tore the page slightly as he jammed it into the gym’s customer file. “How would you like to pay?”  
“Go on, Dan, I’ll handle this,” Phil said, “You go and start your workout, okay? I’ll join you later.”  
Dan nodded, fighting to keep his face straight. “Thanks.”  
By the time he’d finished changing and putting on his trainers, fantasizing about how life would be if they were actually a couple, Phil had come into the changing rooms.  
“Jeez, homophobe much?” Phil asked, evidently irked. “That guy’s the most antagonistic person I’ve spoken to in days.”  
“Yep, say that again,” Dan replied. “Where should we head to first?”  
“Those punching bags are sounding pretty great right now.”  
“Right,” Dan laughed, “Let’s go.”  
Together, they left the changing room to exercise. Phil pulled on the boxing gloves, and took a whack at the bag as Dan steadied it.  
“That one,” he said, “Was for you, Wayne.”  
“Uh, Phil?” Dan said, raising an eyebrow. “I think he’s watching us.”  
Phil peered past the bag to make eye contact with Wayne, who quickly looked away and shuffled some papers at the desk. “Does he still want ‘proof’, or something?”  
“Pfft,” Dan replied, “Wanna go somewhere else?”  
“Yeah, sure. He’s creeping me out. I think it’s gotta be something about the stubble.”  
In the forty five minutes that followed, they tried the ellipticals, the treadmills, the rope climbing machine, and even the weights.  
Wayne followed them. He read a newspaper as they walked, and then wiped down a machine across from them as they ran, repeatedly carrying files to the back room and sneaking glimpses of them as he passed.  
Phil dropped the bar he’d been lifting on the ground, and it clattered onto the mat. “Dan, this is so much work.”  
Dan looked over from where he was standing with a barbell in hand. “Ugh, yeah. Exercise is worse than I’d imagined. Especially with creepy Wayne the only other person in here.”  
“Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” Phil said, looking him straight in the eye and cocking an eyebrow.  
“Vending machine?” Dan replied.  
“Of course.”  
They abandoned the equipment and walked over, with Phil pulling a £2 coin from his pocket and flipping it. As they ogled the selections— Gatorade, water, some weird protein-y stuff that was meant to help you get fit— Phil said something unexpected  
“Hey, Dan— maybe we should just give him what he wants.”  
“Who, Wayne?” Dan replied, distracted by the machines. “You know, he’s still watching us from his desk.”  
“Ugh.” Phil rolled his eyes. “Let’s just do it.”  
Before Dan could say a word, Phil stepped forwards and took Dan’s face in his hands, pressing his lips up against Dan’s as Wayne looked on, eyes wide. Passionately, Dan kissed him back, leaning in as Phil shifted his hands onto the back of Dan’s neck, and up into his hair.  
Dan pulled away as he ran out of breath, and looked into Phil’s eyes.  
“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that,” Phil said, breathless, with flushed cheeks.  
“Me neither.”


End file.
